I have heard many times that cancer is caused by resentment. I first came across this truth while reading Heal Your Body by Louise L. Hay. When I had my first tumor in 2015, I worked hard to heal the resentment I had with my step-father. I learned that I also harbored resentment towards my mother, who in my eyes did not protect me from my step-father.
I had long conversations with both my step-father and mother about the abuse I experienced as a child. I was not looking for apologies: I simply wanted to state what I experienced. I learned a lot from that conversation about the stress and societal confines that my parents were under. I truly believe I forgave them in my heart.
After surgery, the doctor said that remarkably all my lymph nodes are clear. “You don’t need to do adjunctive chemo, just keep doing whatever you are doing,” said the surgeon. I was cured!
Then three years later, the tumors came back. How could this be? I had forgiven my parents. I didn’t have any more resentment towards them.
I am now realizing that even though I don’t have any large resentments towards anyone, I harbor small resentments all the time. If someone cuts me off in traffic, I accuse, judge, and condemn them. When someone doesn’t say hi back to me when I’m walking the dogs, I take it personally and wish they would learn some manners. When my ex-wife tells my sons what a failure I am, I lash back or smolder in my room.
I often feel like a grumpy old man. Even when my sons are in a joyful mood and ask me a simple question, I grunt the answer, annoyed that they even dared to ask me something.
My energy healer said, “Life is too short to be grumpy.” Moreover, a bad attitude causes the body to go into stress mode which releases cortisol. Cortisol causes inflammation. Inflammation cause more pain and helps tumors grow.
Healing is as simple as being happy. I’m learning to sense the grouchiness grow inside of me and counteract it with an inward smile. I always told myself that I didn’t want to grow up to be a grouchy old man. Now that I’m getting old, it is time to make a change.
Happiness is skateboarding with my sons!