A Word, A Word, My Kingdom for a Word

stockicide / Foter.com / CC BY

When you are alone,
watch your mind.

When you are with others,
watch your mouth.

–Tibetan saying from Lambre: Dawn of Enlightenment by Lama Choedak Yuthok

One of the few childhood sayings that is completely erroneous is “Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” I’ve learned the hard way that words can cut deeper than samurai swords.

Marshall Hattori Vader photoI’ve always wanted to be a Jedi Knight so I could use the force to fight people without touching them. Little did I know, I’ve already got that power and I’ve gone to the Dark Side. For as long as I can remember, I’ve been able to make people cry just using words.

Like a repentant Darth Vader, I have decided to use my powers for healing rather than harm. I am vowing today to change my ways and practice what the Buddha called “right speech.”

“Buddha explained right speech as follows: 1. to abstain from false speech, especially not to tell deliberate lies and not to speak deceitfully, 2. to abstain from slanderous speech and not to use words maliciously against others, 3. to abstain from harsh words that offend or hurt others, and 4. to abstain from idle chatter that lacks purpose or depth.” (www.thebigview.com)

Number 3 is my kryptonite. Starting today, I’m going to try to be aware of every word that comes out of my mouth. Here are my red flags:

Profanity–Ever since I saw Bad News Bears when I was 10 years old, profanity has been a staple in my word diet. It got to the point where I used profanity without even knowing it. I’ve silenced a number of authority figures in important meetings by saying “Can we please move the f*#k on?” when I thought I was saying “Can we please move on?”

After much soul searching, I realized I swore when I felt powerless. If someone just dumped me or fired me, they would immediately be a “f#*kin’ something.” When I was losing an argument or a fight, I often resorted to profanity or ad hominem attacks.

Profanity made me feel tough. It shielded my insecurities and prevented anyone from getting close enough to see the real me. I’m dropping the armor–no more swearing.

Psychological Daggers–I’ve always been able to spot weaknesses. I’ve got the uncanny ability to combine words that dig right into the heart of someone’s insecurities. Like an evil ninja, I attack when people are most exposed.

Today, I sheath the daggers and shurikens.

SH#T!–I often find myself yelling exclamations or sounds of displeasure. “Urgh, we are late again.” “Shiiiiiii…, would you go before the light changes.”

Most of these exclamations stem from impatience. By eliminating these sounds I hope to increase my patience, tolerance, and compassion for others.

urgh anime

Moreover, I am going to increase the number of positive words that come out of my mouth. One way I’ve jump started this endeavor is to say “love” to my wife every time I talk to her on the phone. “Hi, Honey. I love that you called me during your break. Wasn’t that a lovely class we had last night?…I love you. Bye.”

Other words that I am focusing on are peace, thank you, compassion, fun, and beauty. Fun is a great one to replace the F-word. “FUUUUUU…NNNY, how you slammed your brakes in the middle of the intersection, you Beeeaaa…utiful elderly driver. Thank you for reminding me to slow down.”

Peace be with you, my compassionate friends. Thank you for reading, sharing, and/or smiling.

Do words themselves effect us as viscerally as I think they do? Or am I being too puritanical? Please share.

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86 comments on “A Word, A Word, My Kingdom for a Word

  1. merbear74 says:

    Is it still ok to use just one teeny tiny “f” word, just for dramatic effect?

  2. Very powerful, Dear Kozo! Yes, we even hear words of Jesus, when someone asked him about eating and “impure” foods, he said something like this “It is not what you put in your mouth that makes you impure, but what comes out of your mouth.” I was first made aware of the significance of speech by an Apache medicine man doing workshops in Berlin where I lived at the time. He had been initiated into “Sacred Language” by his Grandmother and he was passing that knowledge on to us. We all know of “in the Beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God.” Many pointers in this direction.
    Be prepared for setbacks, as our speech habits are quite deep-seated, but every day you will notice the great effect it has on you and yours when you begin to speak Sacred Language.
    with Words of Love on our Way,
    Tomas

    • Kozo says:

      Thanks, Thomas. I’ve already had some setbacks just driving my son around. It is very easy for words to slip out. I find our words good indicators of our thoughts and feelings which can hide from us.
      I would love to hear more about the Apache medicine man. I agree that we need to make our language sacred, and the effects will be powerful.
      {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

      • He basically spoke of several words that are commonly used, such as ‘but’ – ‘maybe’ – ‘I’ll try’ and others which are expressions of having given our power away to the illusion, often in the form of circumstances. We say “I’ll try to be there on time” is expressing from the get-go my insecurity to be able to deal with the circumstances. I may be forced by the traffic to come late. Using expletives is an expression of having given our power away to our past conditioning. I don’t want to relate a six week workshop in one comment, however you might be interested in this article:

        http://www.drsvoboda.com/sacredspeech.htm

        The fifth paragraph is the following one and the next few are good and not too long:

        “Each degree of speech embodies a different kind of perception; each transmits a different reality. Vaikhari, which is ordinary verbal speech, the kind we all hear and use daily, is an expression of kriya shakti, the power of action. You speak in vaikhari when you focus on deeds past, present activities, exploits to come.”

  3. seeker says:

    Luke, beware of the dark force… Ehem, how about baby steps.. A bit too much at one time if I were to do this. May the force with you.

    • Kozo says:

      Haha, Seeker. I’ve always wanted someone to say, “The Force is strong with this one” to me. I agree that it is a lot to tackle at once, but I am allowing myself some mistakes.
      May the Force be with you, always. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  4. Melanie says:

    I’ll have to watch and learn. Not ready for #3, and probably not #4. I’ve dropped the f-bomb in over 40 of my 200 donkey posts. Idle chatter is a necessity of office conversation. I’d rather not get into anything of depth or meaning with the people I’d prefer stay out of my personal life and beliefs.

    • Kozo says:

      Hey Melanie,
      Maybe “This is My Corn” can be your clean language blog. haha.
      I’m lucky that I don’t have to deal with office conversation. I get to choose who I interact with, which is usually bloggers. 🙂

  5. I have had a difficult work week & happy to read your words because I am reminded we can better ourselves if we have that “umpfh!” To do do AND we do & we can!!

  6. Sandy says:

    I’m with you on all but number 3 – I love a good cuss word! I just make sure it’s never directed at anyone. But some words are just so expressive, I’m not ready to give them up! Good Luck, and fight the good fight! May the force be with you!

    • Kozo says:

      I hate to admit it, Sandy, but I agree with you. The taste of a really good cuss word is addicting. I would argue that it stems from the power one gains from the word. They definitely have shock value.
      I guess I’m just at the point in my life when I am ready to give up the power and appeal to create more peace and tranquility in my life. Call it old age, surrender, or fatigue. Like Devo said in the 80s, “I’m through being cool.”
      Thanks for reading and commenting. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  7. diannegray says:

    I absolutely love “FUUUUUU…NNNY, how you slammed your brakes in the middle of the intersection, you Beeeaaa…utiful elderly driver.” HAAAAAA – I’ll have to remember that one 😀

    I’ve suffered from 2. 3. and 4. for most of my life. Like you, I have the ability to cut with words (but not as bad as my mother, who I say has a ‘tongue like a machete’!)

    But I can live with 4. because idle chatter comes in handy when I’m speaking to my in-laws and trying not to use 2 & 3 😉

    • Kozo says:

      Haha, Dianne. I’ll trade you two #2s and a #3 for all your #4s. I love how you use idle chatter to block 2s and 3s. 🙂
      You don’t have to worry about this anymore, but I have a 3 year old and a 5 year old, so FUUUU…NNY and SHIIIII..TAKE MUSHROOMS comes in handy when you realize that you are not alone. :0

  8. kristc99 says:

    Yes indeed, words do have that much power. This is a wonderful post and I wish you every success with your goals

    • Kozo says:

      Thanks, Kris. I’m going to need a lot of luck and patience to accomplish this task. I am excited,however, for old friends to realize that they don’t have to pull out the “ear muffs” every time I come around their kids. 🙂

  9. kasturika says:

    There are so many instances when people use profanities in public spaces like buses and shops – there are children who are likely to hear them, and then they might pick it up; worse, they may think it is appropriate to insult people, without realising that it is insulting. You hit the nail on the head – those who use profanities consider it to be ‘macho’. It is damaging to the society… I once had a huge fight with a friend over this – but I could not change his behaviour. It’s heartening to know that you realise this is a mistake, and are willing to correct it…

    • Kozo says:

      Sadly, Kasturika, I was one of those people. I remember people telling me, “Kozo, watch your language; there are children present.” I usually responded, “Oh, shit. Sorry about that.”
      What I can tell your friend is that I feel much more centered and relaxed since I’ve stopped swearing. Things don’t bother me as much. Maybe because I don’t blow them out of proportion. I’m not sure what the effects are for society, but I feel more at peace.
      Thank you for reading and commenting. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  10. I am going to have to try this myself. I already cut out mindless chatter..it annoys me. Cursing though, yikes. I curse like a sailor on a daily basis. It’s definitely worth trying. After all, I’ve heard it’s “unattractive” when a grown woman swears. :/

    • Kozo says:

      It’s a choice, DDiW. I don’t have any research or evidence, but I just feel like when I curse I lose my cool. I want to stay grounded and centered. I’m experimenting. I let you know what the effects are. I might find that cursing releases pent up emotions like a steam valve that prevents explosions, so refusing to curse causes huge blow ups in my life. 🙂
      p.s. I always found it a bit sexy when women cursed, but I had a huge potty mouth, so birds of a feather.

  11. Dieu says:

    Great post, Kozo. How humble of you to share your human project of bettering yourself. This post reminds me of when I was 12 and learned the joys of profanity. I had a potty mouth because the words made me feel powerful. Ironically, I never swear now!

    • Kozo says:

      I can tell from your poetry, Dieu, that you of all people know the power of words. It doesn’t surprise me that you don’t swear. Your words have healing effects that I want to emulate. Teach me, Master Jedi, how to be a word healer. {{{ Hugs}}} Kozo

  12. electronicbaglady says:

    I always find it so reassuring that it’s not just me that does this! It makes me feel I can become better 🙂
    The f-word is a big problem for me at work – different people react to it so differently and I need to remember they don’t all find it as meaningless as me. But I am more interested in cutting out the cutting remarks, so to speak. They hurt, which seems to me the worse. But on the plus side I haven;t made anyone actually cry for over 2 years now!

    • Kozo says:

      I completely agree, EBL. The cutting remarks are the worst. I am like Chewbaca trying to play Jenga. I just start talking and pretty soon I’ve ripped everyone’s arms off. I’ve decided that I’m just going to shut up or at least speak very carefully when in arguments.
      Thanks for making me cry because I feel so bad about how many people I’ve made cry in the past 2 years. haha
      {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  13. 24.7 says:

    If I were to use the word merd instead of Sh.t or again the same equivalent in French for Fu.k
    It would be easy to see what it is that one points to.
    The compulsive natural function to defecate or copulate. When the mind is squashed by a stressful situation in to the possibility of only one thought one word it will as in the case of fight or flight respond. The way a frightened animal defecates when it is scared that is the fear flight, the fight is the stance the stand up and don’t fu.k. With me , which is do not eat me or Iam going to eat you.

    It expresses your basic nature, the realm of the lower chakra’s.

    If you want to lift yourself up, recognise your base nature is in the flesh,you are an animal.
    On the inception of the mental and emotional response that arises with in you. Stop

    A new world will open up, quite unlike the one you now consider to be normal.

    • Kozo says:

      Wow, I’ve never heard that analysis of profanity before, but it makes complete sense. Yes, I’m hoping that a change in words I use will open a new world of possibilities and love for me and my loved ones. Thank you so much for sharing your guidance and wisdom.
      {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

      • 24.7 says:

        yes , its not the word, although one thinks it is, if one exchanges it for Merd it does not have the same effect as Sh.t, but to a French man it does. Humans want to survive they look for outcomes and safety, because they live in fear. They use violence to do so. They control by it even down to language.
        Is it the language of faith, is it the language of forgiveness.
        The most basic reaction results in it, even standing in a line at the checkout. Society has it as Normal. The most powerful countries in the world have always been the most violent. The Roman’s the British and now the United States.
        It is so inherent it is issued from ones mouth unknowingly. I know you look for peace Kozo , honesty about ones condition is the only way to see it.
        The analysis was for you my friend, it has not been given before.

  14. Tracy says:

    Thought provoking as ever Master Jedi 🙂 I think words affect us even if we hope they don’t. The way we speak (aloud or inside our heads) shapes our outcomes. Positive words = positive outcomes and positive people live longer – see here: http://www.reuters.com/article/2009/03/05/us-optimist-health-idUSTRE5247NO20090305). May the force (and hugs) be with you 🙂

    • Kozo says:

      Tracy, you really know how to make a person feel good about themselves. I’ve have always wanted to be a Master Jedi. I’m not one yet, but the fact that you even joked about it made me smile.
      I completely agree that “Positive words = positive outcomes and positive people live longer.” And now I have research behind it. Yay.
      {{{Jedi Hugs}}} to you, my wonderful BBF. Kozo

  15. Continually as I read your thoughts I am struck by how similar we are. Profanity has been a staple of my everyday language, with friends or to make a point, and I still think it when I am emotional. Like someone cuts me off in traffic, or something, the f bomb rolls. but it is a matter of choice. I also loved the Darth Vader reference because I think that we have more of this power than we realize. Hitting someone right where they are most vulnerable was a weapon I used all too often. Thanks again Kozo, another great post. I have moved away from the dark side and life is infinitely better because of it.

    • Kozo says:

      Thanks, Jonathan. I am starting to realize that men tend to be less compassionate than women, although men don’t tend to have as much problems with self-compassion. It sounds like a huge generalization, and it is, but I am toying with the idea. I really appreciate you being another man who can empathize with me. I especially appreciate your honesty and willingness to change. I feel blessed that on my journey to become a better, peaceful, loving person, I can walk next to you. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  16. MindMindful says:

    I discovered that I took to swearing so that I would be noticed — by shocking others, I got attention. But like you, I am seeking to only let better speech to leave my mouth. It’s easiest, really, when I just keep it shut, haha! I find that I am increasingly quieter…………….

    • Kozo says:

      Me too, Shala. I find I’m a lot more quieter, except online of course. 🙂
      I am a middle child, so maybe I started swearing to get noticed as well. I don’t feel the need to be noticed as much, although I’m sure my ego would say differently.
      Thanks for the comment and honesty. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

      • MindMindful says:

        I’m a middle child too! In between 2 brothers. I am finding that keeping quiet more often & not interjecting every thought of mine allows me to observe more. And — in my wildest dreams — makes me appear to be a wise one, haha

      • Kozo says:

        Not just appear, Shala.<bow> The silent one is always the wise one. </bow>

      • MindMindful says:

        Thank you, my wise friend! _/\_

  17. Great post Kozo, and I was laughing at the last bit! Personally, I feel cuss words are okay IF it isn’t your predominate mode of communication. I never curse around my family( parents and elders), at work ( maybe I let a f bomb slip once or twice around co-workers, never when customers are around), and when I was in school i never cursed at all. I rarely curse here on my blog. When I’m home? I cuss up a storm. Even if I’m cooking, lets say frying something and the oil splatters I will call whatever I’m cooking every name in the book. I think it’s a release. It lets out tension. As with everything, there is a time and place for everything. SO i think some aspects of removing profanity, possibly when you are aggravated because it will help break the cycle of frustration and keep things from escalating. Plus, improvement is improvement and only positive can come from trying to better your life and speech and presentation. Good Luck!

    I think I’m going to work on having more useful conversation. I have ALOT of meaningful chats online through blogging but very little substance conversation in person to person.

    • Kozo says:

      Haha, hot oil can bring out the sailor in me as well, Tasha. I like what you said about breaking the cycle of frustration and keeping things from escalating. I have noticed that when I over-react to a small mishap, I start a downhill spiral that leads to a shii…ady day.
      I also agree that I have a lot more meaningful chats online (like this one). I guess the easiest solution is to just blog more. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  18. Sunshine says:

    our small tongue is capable of destroying so much…one moment flows words of peace & harmony, next a broken sewer line pours forth.
    going in another direction from our reckless tongue is sitting through movies with talented actors that fail to set higher standards when it comes to profanity. granted, some themes need the effects of profuse profanity but many can do without it.
    Good on you, Kozo! May the force to clean up the airwaves be with you! Peace + love ❤

    • Kozo says:

      Hahaha. Sunshine, you purify me. I love “the Force to clean up the airwaves.”
      I’m also going to demand right speech from my sons. I guess I have to clean up my act first, before I can expect them to follow suit. Thanks for shining on my blog today. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

      • Sunshine says:

        This reminds me of Rodney Atkins song: Watching You….

        “Driven’ through town just my boy and me
        With a Happy Meal in his booster seat
        Knowin’ that he couldn’t have the toy ‘til his nuggets were gone.
        A green traffic light turned straight to red
        I hit my brakes and mumbled under my breath.
        His fries went a flyin’, and his orange drink covered his lap
        Well, then my four year old said a four letter word
        It started with “S” and I was concerned
        So I said, “Son, now where’d you learn to talk like that?”

        Chorus:
        He said, “I’ve been watching you, dad ain’t that cool?
        I’m your buckaroo, I wanna be like you.
        And eat all my food and grow as tall as you are.
        We got cowboy boots and camo pants
        Yeah, we’re just alike, hey, ain’t we dad?
        I want to do everything you do.
        So I’ve been watching you.”
        *****
        Cool cowboy song…haha 🙂

  19. Sarah says:

    Great, funny and heartfelt! I am with you all the way…. Um, except for the rather large part about no swearing! Lol! I do drop the occasional (?) f-bomb, but I try to concentrate on the emotion behind it, rather than the word itself. I am with you 100% on being more patient, grateful and kind to our fellow humans. Love love love the paragraph about “fun” and “beauty”. Truly funny! 😀

    • Kozo says:

      Swearing is a tough one to give up, Sarah. What I have found is that by turning FUUUU…into FUUUNNN, I change not only the word, but also the underlying emotion. It is almost like switching gasoline with water. One adds fuel to the fire, while the other helps extinguish the fire. Plus, my kids get a kick out of me yelling, FUUUUU…NNNY.
      But the most important change I want to make is to treat others better, so I’m glad we are on the same page there. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  20. I’m pretty fantastically (looky there I did a substitute) sure you didn’t mean for this to be comical…but it was. And I thank you very much for it. So that was a long yes to the question. Words carry weight as do the absence of words.

    • Kozo says:

      Love the substitution of fantastical, GM. See how easy it is? You brought up a good point that making these changes in my language also adds the possibility for laughter, especially with my young kids. Although I just caught some of Louis C.K.’s show and it was pretty “fantastically” funny. He does some good analysis of connotation and denotation of cuss words. Thanks for the “fantastical” comment. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  21. Hmmm, yes Louis C.K. good material there! I’ve been practicing this for a while myself. Especially when I’m monitoring my thoughts. It’s more of an effort when no one is around. You are more than welcome for the comment. It was my pleasure 🙂

  22. Kozo, I admire you for being so open in sharing what you see as your faults. It was very enjoyable reading your views and intentions.

    It is the intention behind the words that has the power of affecting us and others. Your awareness of this and your drive towards changing your intentions through language is already a battle won towards your goal.

    • Kozo says:

      Thanks, Lena, for reminding me of the power of intention. I read Wayne Dyer’s book with the same title years ago and it changed my life. Now I am trying to be more diligent on a daily/minute-by-minute basis. I appreciate your like-minded encouragement and guidance. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  23. KM Huber says:

    As others have mentioned, thank you for revealing us to ourselves through your honest portrayal of yourself. It takes courage to respond rather than react, and you have given us practical ways to do so. Terrific post, Kozo!

    Karen

    • Kozo says:

      I love that, Karen, “respond rather than react.” Imagine if we all “respond” with compassion in every situation. I smell World Peace. 🙂

  24. Dawna says:

    One thing I have come to realize… Words are energy. Each has it’s own distinct signature based upon the intention we put behind it. Changing the words we choose from moment to moment is, indeed, a start, I believe, and one that your post has helped me to recognize the necessity of where I am concerned as well. 🙂 The next step I intuit after that is to transmute the emotions (also energy) behind them as well.

    Great thought provoking post, Kozo!

    • Kozo says:

      Exactly, Dawna. What I am finding is that by changing the words, the emotions or energy change. Rather than finish FUUUUU… with a profanity, I finish it with FUN. All that anger and frustration can change to laughter and joy. “It’s so simpo.”
      Thank you for helping me analyze and delve deeper into this practice. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  25. 1EarthUnited says:

    Really poignant post… we are such creatures of habit. I agree with you Kozo, to really change we must set our intention and overcome lifetimes of conditioning. Also be compassionate towards others and oneself because it’s a process. Awesome, you are totally conscious of what you need to do, best wishes + all of my love to you and your family. Your sons are so lucky, they’ll look up to the man you aspire, and will become. Watch this video very carefully, it’ll change your reality:

    Have a great weekend! 😀

    • Kozo says:

      Maddy, You are an angel. I was having a bit of a backsliding day today, and I needed some motivation. Your comment and this video were exactly what I needed.
      “Circumstances don’t matter; Only state of being matters.”
      I also needed the concept of play, because I need to remember that it is a process. We will return to old habits. I am such a perfectionist that I thought I could just decide to change and that would be the end of it. Of course, God/the Universe jumped all over that egotistical hubris.
      I am going to spend the rest of the day “playing” and embracing my state of being.
      {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

      • 1EarthUnited says:

        Glad to be part of your swearing support group, lol. Why not? There seems to be a support group for everything else in the world. We’ll all eat granola, sing Kumbaya, stuff socks in our mouths. Just think of it as one of the steps toward world peace. 😉

      • Kozo says:

        That’s it! I’m putting you, Sofia, and Sunshine on speed dial for when I need some emergency support. You guys can talk me down when I’m about to go into road rage. I was thinking that I’ve never sworn while I was getting a hug. hint hint. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  26. djmatticus says:

    I always hated the saying “stick and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me,” because the kids that were always tormenting me never attacked me with sticks and stones – they always attacked me with words. Words hold power that physical items can never possess. I saulte your effort to watch your words and use them for good. I find that I’m currently waivering somewhere near the dark side… I use my words for both good and bad.

    • Kozo says:

      Yeah, DJ. I learned the hard way that words can leave scars that take years to heal. Sometimes they don’t heal.
      My main problem now that I’ve decided to be more forgiving and loving is that “I’ve been in the revenge business so long, I don’t know what to do with the rest of my life.” haha
      Thanks for reading, commenting, and following. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

      • djmatticus says:

        Have you considered piracy?
        I think you are already on a great track – and those of us still on the fence could look to you for inspiration on which side we should come down on.

  27. Right speech has to come along with the others…right action….right intention. That’s a biggie right there – intention 🙂

    Words can certainly wound and I think children and teens need to be reminded of that but as I’ve gotten older I’m not so sensitive – people can say what they like, I’m not so bothered 🙂

    • Kozo says:

      Great points, Annie. <bow> I had focused so much on right speech that I forgot about the other part of the Eightfold Path </bow>
      I also agree that if we vibrate at a higher frequency, then the words and actions of others won’t disturb us.
      I guess I’m still concerned about the words and opinions of others. Thank you for reminding me, Bodhisattva Annie. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  28. Its hard to watch every word that comes out of your mouth. Especially when it is part of your pattern. I think I may join you and see if I can do it too. Great post Kozo

    • Kozo says:

      Yay, Athena. Just to let you know, Maddy from 1earthunited is starting a swearing support group for us. We’ll burn sage every time someone uses profanity. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  29. wisdompartner says:

    As a writer and lover of words I have always reflected on how our words, as our thoughts, create our world. Austrian born philosopher Ludwig Joseph Johann Wittgenstein stated “If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.” Something like changing F#@X into Funnnny. Words can and do shift us if we can even become aware of our state of being and the desire to shift our perceptions and as a result shift our state of being. And….every once in a while I know that I would just like to revel in my S#@X. Love to you Kozo!

    • Kozo says:

      Haha, Alicia. If we could all revel in our sh*t, how wonderful would our lives be.
      I agree that it is all about shifting our state of being. Right now, I am focusing on words and emotions. Maybe in the future I will focus on actions and silence. It is a wonderful journey, isn’t it? {{{Hugs]}} Kozo

  30. Subhan Zein says:

    Nice post, thank you for sharing, Kozo. Many blessings and much love to you. 🙂

    And when you speak,
    remember that a word
    that is uttered by your tongue
    is an arrow shot from the bow.

    You cannot make
    the arrow turn back
    on its way,
    but you can adjust
    its direction
    before unleashing it.

    Subhan Zein

    • Kozo says:

      Subhan,
      Somehow I missed this comment when you first posted it. I just wanted to tell you that I love the poem. I have fired far too many arrows in my day. I am working on adjusting the direction back at myself. 🙂
      {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  31. Silverback says:

    Thank you Kozo. You bring peace and light to us lesser mortals. I work as a mobile carer, and many of my patients are receiving ‘end of life’ care. It is always important to remember that the words I use can have either a healing or detrimental effect upon them and their relatives. My biggest failing is dealing with other road users! My patience does fail me at times and the inevitable profanity is occasionally unavoidable. I have a friend who sometimes travels with me and when I’m extremely frustrated by another drivers actions, saves me from myself by uttering the profanities for me! Is that allowable do you think?
    May the force (of peace) be with you always. {{{Hugs}} to you Kozo.
    Chris.

    • Kozo says:

      Haha, I love that, Chris, a surrogate swearer. I once heard an interview with a Native American surgeon who was practicing Western Medicine. She had a temper, but was extremely meticulous. She would go over every detail when she lost a patient. At one point, she realized that arguments, bad energy in the OR caused her patients to die even when she did the surgery perfectly. She is now incorporating Native American practices of creating a peaceful environment in the OR. I am glad you are aware of the same ideas as a mobile carer, Chris.
      Sometimes I think that traffic is one of the most powerful everyday gurus to teach us patience and compassion. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo

  32. C. R. says:

    all of these Related articles have now been posted on our b4peace facebook
    Return to Sender – Buddha Style (zen-haven.com)
    Watch Your Mind, Watch Your Mouth: A New Year’s Resolution from Compassionate Rebel (Compssionaterebel.wordpress.com)
    The Word (knockedoverbyafeather.wordpress.com)
    When You Do Things from Your Soul – B4Peace (heartflow2013.wordpress.com)
    Happy New year and B4peace (knockedoverbyafeather.wordpress.com)

  33. […] I’ve been trying to increase the number of positive words I use. I try to say, write, feel, or express “love” as much as I can, whether that be using […]

  34. Wow! You certainly reaped a lot of words on this one already! Here’s another one my wife just posted (if you get a moment when you want to read again 😉
    http://vision5d2012.wordpress.com/2013/02/04/sacred-language-the-power-of-our-words/

  35. […] Gurus 1 2 3 4 5 (sometimes Kozo’s writing moves me to tears, no […]

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